Spend Next Semester on the Throne at Cair Paravel

When I discovered Fantasy Programs Abroad, I admit I was torn. Do I explore Middle Earth or do I head to a winter wonderland? I chose winter wonderland since elves and dwarves are so passe. I admit I was a little put out when I saw that there was only an option to study at Cair Paravel.

I frankly wanted to live in a world of perpetual winter. Christmas is overrated because you could live every day like it was Christmas and just buy gifts for yourself. Instead, as a snowboarder, I couldn't think of anything better than snow, hills, and the warming drink that the White Witch provides. Since this option was frustratingly removed from my choices, I made do with what I was given.

I learned a fair amount of archery, politics, and riding and conversing with lions. I did like the fact that we had a lot of field trips so that we could explore different areas of the nation.

Frankly I was initially quite skeptical of going through the wardrobe. But then I realized that I don't fully understand the physics behind space travel and would jump at the chance to be an astronaut anyway, so I went for it! I followed Lucy full speed ahead behind the coats and hoped for the best. Worst case I'd end up with a nasty bump on the head, right? You only live once and whatnot.

I can't say enough great things about my semester in Narnia and have a ton of fun stories, but I suppose it'd be more useful if I shared some tips. First off, pack for warmer weather if you're studying there during the second half of the year. I had heard of the snow-covered landscape there, so I packed wool socks, mittens, scarfs and a coat that made me look like a deformed marshmallow. But given the absence of the White Witch, the weather was actually quite pleasant. Fortunately Cair Paravel now has a lovely store filled with all sorts of apparel. I am now the proud owner of numerous branded clothing items including a 'Nobody Told Me It Would Be This Warm in Narnia' tanktop (featuring Mr. and Mrs. Beaver in beach attire under a hot sun, holding little umbrella-topped drinks); an 'I Met Aslan and You Didn't' hat; a pair of shorts that reads 'Turkish Delight' across the bum; a 'Tumnus umbrella' (oh yeah it rains!); and a 'Sometimes I Miss the White Witch' tshirt with a smartphone screen showing 88 degrees and 110% humidity as the current weather (though I wouldn't recommend wearing it while in Narnia).

Let's see. What else? Oh yes, although most of the time you won't actually be sitting on a throne, you will have to endure some extremely long ceremonies, and the thrones are quite hard. The first time I sat for hours on the throne had no idea, and I'm pretty sure I bruised my coccyx. So be sure to bring a seat cushion. You can also buy one there, but for some reason the batch they had ordered when I was there was defective and kept making a farting sound every time I shifted. My classmate used a rented one, and that one was okay, but who wants to use a cushion other people's bums were on? Better to bring your own.

This one sounds weird but trust me: don't become Facebook friends with Aslan or let him follow you on Instagram. He will visit Cair Paravel during the party at the end of your semester there and he will be really cool, with his awesome mane and regal swagger. And he is cool. Nothing against Aslan. The dude's alright. But he basically never sleeps and has boundless energy for everything from fighting in battle to tracking activity on social media, so it will start to feel like he's stalking you. He's totally not stalking you in particular, but if you want to avoid that feeling it's better just not to engage on social media. Even on Twitter, he started following me and literally retweeted every one of my tweets for like 12 days before I blocked him. I saw him at a reunion barbecue after that and we're still friends, but save yourself the awkwardness and just steer clear of Aslan on the social media front.

Oh one last thing I would share as far as tips is that if you're one of those people who opens a bag of chips and can't stop until half the bag's gone (guilty) don't try the Turkish Delight. That stuff is like crack. Am I allowed to say that on a review site? Anyway, it's seriously addictive. I didn't realize how bad it was until I noticed that not just me but all of my classmates had gained 15-20 pounds over the course of the semester. I should have guessed when I noticed that my shorts, like all the other clothing 'bottoms' in the Cair Paravel store, had an elastic waistband. Fortunately, when you go back through the wardrobe, you look just like you did before. But all of your Narnia pictures will forever immortalize chubby you. One of my classmates is unable to put on a single pound in the 'real world,' so she was Thrilled to put on some weight. It's your call on the extra pounds - I'm just passing on the info.

The program's pretty selective, so if you're admitted, go for it! It's rare you get to go someplace that is Actually magical, so don't miss your chance. It will be one of the best semesters of your life and you'll create memories that will last a lifetime. Your friends back home won't believe you at first, but unlike Lucy after her first visit, you'll have the pictures to prove it.